Rants in My Pants: Charlie Sheen

In my first ever edition of Rants in My Pants, I will start out by calling out Charlie Sheen.

Yes, everyone knows very well by now how much trouble he’s gotten himself into lately. He’s gotten into so much trouble that it would make his publicist cry (and subsequently resign as a result).

Charlie Sheen has covered all the bases when it comes to the worst addictions celebrities can get themselves into — booze, drugs, porn. He’s even railed against his own employers such as show runner Chuck Lorre, criticizing him for his own shortcomings.

Now, Charlie has committed himself to getting clean and sobered up again and returning back to work. Why bother even going back to working on one of the worst shows on television? Now, because of the train wreck Charlie has become, Two and a Half Men will become more popular than ever before when it returns. In other words, the show will never die.

I will acknowledge, however, that his problems are real problems ordinary people also encounter. Drug addiction and alcoholism are serious issues that have real impact on people’s lives. Just like how addictions can affect the individual and the people around them, Charlie Sheen is doing himself a disservice to his own family, friends and the people he works with by letting himself succumb to his own addictions.

Charlie Sheen is a star who is too big to fail. No matter how much trouble he gets himself into, no matter how big those troubles are, no matter how much people will detest him as a result, he will not go down easily. If the Broadway production of Spider Man has taught us anything, it’s that huge disasters that get widely publicized will bring more people in than it would draw away.

Charlie, give up while you’re ahead. I know you’re too popular to go away but it’s for your own good. Trust me.